On Second Thought…

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“I could stay awake…just to hear you breathing… Watch you smile while you were sleeping, while you far away dreaming….” (Aerosmith – Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing)

…Err…on second thought…nah! I won’t stay awake just hearing you breathing — it’ll be quite boring I’ll eventually fell asleep so…rather than that, can we just make out instead?

#failed romantic

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Funny Thing About Adult Is… (In A Child’s View)

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…They think they know what’s best for you and others in everything. How to talk, how to dress, how to behave, etc.
But once in a while, you should see them when they’re going to meet their future in laws — suddenly they have no clue about what to say, what to wear, or even how to behave — for themselves.

Now how can you believe someone that don’t even know what to say, what to wear, and how to behave to tell you how you should talk, dress, and behave?

See? No wonder a lot of children won’t listen to adult’s advice nowadays

A Guide To Driving In Jakarta

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So you are the new face in town, or maybe you just got your driver’s license, or you want to start driving again after a long time…, worry not, i will tell you some crucial points you need to know when you are driving in Jakarta.

Traffic Lights

The way the traffic lights in Jakarta works in the same as anywhere else. But the INTERPRETATION is slightly different.

The Red Light means stop. Just the same as anywhere else.

The Green Light means Go or keep going. This also the same with anywhere else.

The Yellow Light is a bit more trickier. While in most places the yellow light means caution, here in Jakarta it has several interpretations :

  • The yellow light as a transition from green light to red light means : Throttle like crazy you fool! Hurry before the light turn red! Go go go!!!!!!
  • The yellow light as a transition from red light to green light :
    • If you are in the front line : Hurry MOVE!! Don’t waste even a millisecond. And don’t even think to wait till the light turn to green before pedaling the gas.
    • If you are not in the front line : If the car in front of you waste just a millisecond before pedaling to the floor, HONK! Yes, HONK like crazy!!!

If you are used to a more civilized conduct on the street, you may need a little getting used to. But don’t worry I think you’ll wrap your head around this whole “yellow light rule” in no time.

Highway

This you may already knew :

The highway is usually consist of three lanes plus one emergency lane. The common sense (for the country where the driver seat is at the front right part of the car) is out of the three lanes (excluding the emergency lane)the right-most lane is “the fastest lane” and the left-most lane is “the slowest lane”.

So if one day you feel unsure about driving because you are sleepy at the time, or you think maybe there’s something wrong with your tires, it’s just seems sensible to go to real slow and therefore go all the way left to the emergency lane.”After all, these kind of conditions are what the emergency lane is intended for, right?” you thought. You can’t be more WRONG!!! It seems that for the people driving in Jakarta getting 15 minutes or 30 minutes sooner to their destination is considered THE ULTIMATE EMERGENCY — reflected in how they utilize the emergency lane just like the right-most lane. The Emergency lane is the fast lane…that is UNLESS there’s a patrolling police around, those drivers tend to dramatically change their actions at the sight of a patrolling officer, I’m not sure why.

Another thing you should pay attention to while driving in Jakarta’s highway is the speed limit. Your GPS may tell you that in most the maximum speed limit is 100 kmph, but you will see that most drivers ignore this and yet no highway patrol on their tails. As a matter of fact, try driving on the fast lane and drive at 100 kmph when you can go faster, I guarantee the driver behind you will be pissed off. In short, drivers in Jakarta expect you to drive as if you are constantly in a hurry. And what about the speed limit signs? Just ignore them,I suspect they are expired a long time ago and kept there for nostalgic and (un)decorative purpose.

Turn Signal

My suggestion to you is : Learn mind reading quick!

There are three types of drivers in Jakarta regarding their usage of turn signals :

  • The Sensible Drivers. These are the drivers who use turn signals as they supposed too. Good news : this gesture has a high correlation with ethical and safe driving. Bad News : the population of these type of drivers are growing smaller each passing days.
  • The To0-cool-for-turn-signals Drivers. These drivers are the main reason for you to follow my suggestion to learn mind reading. The too-cool-for-turn-signals drivers expect you to know exactly when they will change lanes or make a turn, therefore they never bother using the turn signals. Traffic accidents caused by this type of drivers is quite common, and yet unfortunately the population of this type of drivers is slowly but surely increasing.
  • The “At-least-they-tried” Drivers. This type of drivers is the other reason for you to learn mind reading. This type of drivers is more considerate, they actually use the turn signals — it’s a good thing right? For one little kink : they’re giving the wrong signals (i.e : lighting the left turn signals when they are actually want to make a right turn). Some of the drivers of the population are the too-cool-for-turn-lights driver who already repent, it’s just that they haven’t used the turn signals for so long they apparently forgotten how to operate it — thus the wrong signals. The rest of the population of this type of drivers consist of nervous amateurs and drivers who just can’t get the signals right for the reason only the heaven can explain. But well…at least they tried.

Advanced Technique

So you get a hold of the basics and you want more? You want to Jakarta’s next bad-ass drivers? Here’s some tips :

For reasons that escape me, most drivers in Jakarta considered driving like you are in such a hurry and recklessly along with a few rules breaking  as a display of driving expertise. So up to that standard you may want to :

  • Maximize the usage of your car horn. Just honk like there’s no tomorrow.
  • Minimize the usage of brake. Anytime you need to slow down don’t do it unless it’s the only option, instead just change lanes — do a zigzag driving. and yes you’ll be so focused at maintaining and increasing your velocity you may as well just ignore the usage of turn signals.

Well a friendly words of advice : If you really want to apply those two techniques I suggest you to do these things beforehand :

  • Make sure you have a car insurance and heck why not a life insurance as well, just in case.
  • Write a will, just in case.
  • Make peace with everyone dear to you, just in case.
  • Make sure you’re driving alone or with people with the same  insani…*cough*I mean guts as yours.

Okay, I think that’s about it. Happy Driving!!

Superheroes Among Us

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Well, do you recognize them? The superheroes around us? There are actually quite a lot of them.

No, I’m not lying. It’s true that there are superheroes among us that you probably get to see on a daily basis.

Okay, I know you still don’t believe me. So let’s start the explanation…

  • What is the basic requirement of a superhero?

Well, one of the basic requirement is to have some kind of power or ability.

  • Will animal’s power/ability do the trick?

Of course, just see Spider-man with his spider ability, Aqua man with his fish ability, etc.

  • Well I guess that makes someone a super-being, but superhero require more than that….

True. A superhero is the super-being who use their power/ability to do some good for others, to make the world of better place.

Okay, now with that concept let’s take a little more observant look at our daily life. When you were in a queue, did you ever see someone try to cut the line? And got irritated by that selfish gesture? Well that sucks right? But unfortunately more and more people are being that ignorant nowadays. Such a shame, because as Ms. Clarentia Prameta said in her blog post “Bebek Aja Bisa Ngantri”Even Ducks Know How To Queue.

Even ducks can queue

Hey wait…now if that be the case…doesn’t it mean that the other peoples in the queuing line, the ones who are not being selfish and try to cut the line a super-being? (remember the concept of the super being stated above?)

How so? Because they possess the power/ability of the DUCKS — they know how to queue and they can do it well.

And even more, by using the ability of the DUCKS, those super-beings has make the world a better place. They help preventing chaos from happening (try picturing a queuing line where NO ONE want to queue and instead tackling each other to be in front of the line — now that’s chaos), they preserve peace. Should there be no people that want to queue, maybe none of the people that can whatever service given in the front of the line, so even though they too are in a rush, they sacrifice their precious time for greater benefit of others. Just like what SUPERHEROES in my childhood comic books, they make the world a better place.

So there you have it…the Superheroes among us. I hope now we all have a greater respect towards those people patiently queuing in line, they are superheroes after all

Good Point, Little Girl!

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Just downloaded WordPress for Blackberry App and I can’t wait to try it out. I figure, even though this entry is merely intended to try out the app, I still am obliged to write something interesting for you peeps. Well, one story comes to mind : a story about the beauty of the simplicity of the mind of the young ones (whew, that’s a lot of “of the”s used in one sentence ain’t it?)

So one day I was accompanying my mom and sis to a great huge mall in the heart of Jakarta (I know you can guess what mall it is), and as most females in malls they did the routine of spending hours looking around the shops. Getting bored, I decided to go people watching.
My attention caught by a little girl playing LEGO (there’s currently a free-to-use LEGO playing site inside the mall) accompanied by her mother. Those two are having arguments, it seems that the mother want them to get going while the little girl insist to finish building her LEGO construction before they leave. It seems they’re running late for something because the mother said “C’mon, let’s going already. As a matter of fact, we should have left ten minutes ago“. You know what the little girl’s answer? Her answer is very smart and right-on. She said “Mom, if you don’t constantly bothered me while I was building this construction, I would have finished it fifteem minutes ago“.
Boo Yah mam! Your daughter got a very good point there!

Philantropic : A Shortcut To Higher Productivity

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Sekali-sekali nulis entry dalam bahasa Indonesia ah…(Tapi judul tetap dengan bahasa Inggris, karena ga nemu judul versi bahasa Indonesia yang cukup “sreg!”)

Entry ini saya tujukan untuk orang-orang rajin di luar sana yang merasa dirinya harus meningkatkan produktivitas sedangkan waktu yang dimiliki sangat terbatas. Tenang saja kawan, karena pada konsepnya kita dapat menjadi “produktif” dengan cukup mudah, asalkan kita memiliki kebaikan hati dan kemauan untuk berbagi. Mulai terdengar aneh? baiklah kita mulai elaborasinya agar tidak menjadi semakin bingung.

Untuk memulai topik yang satu ini, ada baiknya kita lihat dulu, sebenarnya definisi dari produksi itu apa sih?

Kalo menurut kata http://id.wikipedia.org/wiki/Produksi –yang saya akses pada 8 Des 2010 pukul 18.45 WIB (dan saya rasa definisi tersebut cukup tepat, meskipun dosen-dosen saya saya selalu mengingatkan “BAHAYA MENGGUNAKAN WIKIPEDIA” dengan alasan validitas isi dari informasi yang dipaparkan di dalamnya; saya rasa yang pernah menjadi mahasiswa belakangan ini tahu fenomena yang saya maksud yaitu saat dimana dosen sangat menganggap tabu sumber informasi open source via web seperti wikipedia dan google dan bila ketahuan kita tetap nekad menggunakannya kita akan mendapat tatapan layaknya telah melakukan pengkhianatan besar-besaran);

[Produksi merupakan suatu kegiatan yang dikerjakan untuk menambah nilai guna suatu benda atau menciptakan benda baru sehingga lebih bermanfaat dalam memenuhi kebutuhan]. Kegiatan menambah daya guna suatu benda tanpa mengubah bentuknya dinamakan produksi jasa. Sedangkan kegiatan menambah daya guna suatu benda dengan mengubah sifat dan bentuknya dinamakan produksi barang. Produksi bertujuan untuk memenuhi kebutuhan manusia untuk mencapai kemakmuran. Kemakmuran dapat tercapai jika tersedia barang dan jasa dalam jumlah yang mencukupi.

Kita fokuskan definisi dari produksi pada kalimat pertama dari definisi di atas (yang saya tandai dengan kurung siku berwarna merah), juga perhatikan penekanan pada istilah “menambah nilai guna” (yang juga sudah saya andai di atas).

Jadi menurut definisi tersebut, produksi menyangkut suatu kegiatan yang dapat menambah nilai guna…, dengan demikian untuk menjadi produktif menjadi lebih mudah bukan? Mungkin sampai disini poin saya masih bekum terlihat jelas, baiklah bila demikian kita lanjutkan elaborasinya.

Melihat definisi dari produksi dan hubunganya dengan judul entry ini, tidakkah kalian menyadari bahwa menjadi dermawan dan memberi sedekah merupakan salah satu cara paling cepat dan mudah untuk mentransformasi nilai suatu benda/materi — dalam konteks ini materi paling relevan adalah– uang menjadi bertambah?

Ilustrasinya sebagai berikut :

anda punya uang senilai…katakanlah 70 ribu rupiah, dan katakanlah dengan level lifestyle anda sekarang, anda terbiasa untuk jalan-jalan ke mall dan makan di restoran seperti  dan dengan jumlah uang tersebut, saya memperkirakan anda bisa memperoleh sekitar hanya satu kali makan di restoran tersebut. Jadi bagi anda nilai dari 70 ribu rupiah adalah sama dengan satu kali makan. Bandingkan bila uang tersebut anda berikan kepada seorang pengemis di lampu merah — dengan level lifestyle seorang pengemis saya rasa mengatakan sekali makan budget 10 ribu rupiah saja sudah sangat tinggi, dan bahkan dengan perhitungan demikian dengan memberikan “uang untuk satu kali makan” anda kepada pengemis tersebut, uang tersebut mendadak berubah menjadi “uang untuk tujuh kali makan”. Lihat!!! Uang anda telah bertambah nilainya menjadi tujuh kali lipat dalam hitubgan detik; itu bila diandaikan si pengemis budget sekali makannya 1 ribu rupiah untuk sekali makan (yang saya rasa TIDAK mungkin demikian pada kenyataannya), andaikata si pengemis memiliki budget sekali makan 3 ribu rupiah saja maka dengan memberikan “uang satu kali makan” anda kepada seorang pengemis anda telah melipatgandakan nilai uang anda menjadi lebih dari 23 kali lipat dalam hitungan detik. Bandingkan dengan pekerjaan harian anda — perusahaantempat anda bekerja melakukan proses produksi yang jau lebih besar, mungkin pertambahan nialinya puluhan ribu kali lipat, tapi ingat anda hanya suatu bagian dari perusahaan tersebut, dan bila dikuantifikasi peran anda terhadap keseluruhan perusahaan, berapa persen andil anda? Jadi kalu dihitung-hitung berapa besar nilai tambah yag anda hasilkan sebagai suatu bagian dari suatu perusahaan? Apakah mencapai 23 kali lipat dalam hitungan detik?

So…, jangan ngaku orang yang produktif jika masih jarang berderma *hehehe*

Nah, sekarang sudah melihat poin saya? itu baru 70 ribu rupiah, apa jadinya ketika anda telah menjadi multi-millionaire, memutuskan untuk menjadi philanthropist dan menyumbangkan jutaan atau mungkin puluhan, atau bahkan ratusan juta rupiah ke charity foundations? jauh lebih besar bukan “produktivitas” anda?

So The Chances Are You Better Off Flirting With…

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Okay so one day me and my sis were grabbing some slices of pizza and enjoying a nice evening meal at one of the largest mall in Jakarta and she ask me if I will ever flirt with random girls I meet in public places such as the mall.

Well, I’m not that extroverted a person so flirting with some strangers I meet randomly is kind of a challenge for me plus,  such a thing is hardly common here in Indonesia. But if I think it’s worth it (or I simply don’t have anything better to do anyway) why not?–it turns out to be, just a couple of weeks afterward I did (but I ain’t gonna tell you about it  boo-hoo)

And then she (as in mys sister lest you forget) raises the bar : “what if she’s with her group of friends, will you still approach her?” and then “what if she’s with her family?”

Trying to throw a joke I said “I’m not sure…, but if she’s with her guy, I’ll definitely approach her” of course followed by a *lol*

But then we look into it a bit more and Hey! Flirting with a girl who is currently hanging out with her guy is probably a good idea! (okay by now you have two choices : think of me as an insane soul or just play along realizing this will eventually turned out  to be a joke, kinda uncommon and a bit extreme kind of jokes but it’s just me and my jokes. I STRONGLY suggest the latter). Okay, so let’s start analyzing :

when you’re out in a mall…

  • Consideration in approaching a girl who is ALONE at the time

Okay first off we should consider her sexual preference. Well, you gotta admit nowadays people are more open about their sexual preference, more and more people are confirming that they are attracted to the same sex. If she is alone, there’s no way to tell for sure whether she will enjoy a company of a guy or she prefer a company of another girl. Plus a research said that female are more likely to have homosexual tendencies than male. oh cr*p, there you go first uncertainty you face when you’re approaching a girl who is alone.

Secondly, let’s consider er own willingness to engage in romantic situations. You never know, she might just ended a long relationship, or just lost someone dear to her, etc. But the fact that she is alone may as well mean that she is NOT looking for company at the time being and flirting with her may not be the smartest thing you’ll ever do. But of course the fact that she is alone, may also mean a good news for you. But still, we don’t know for sure , so that my friend mark the second uncertainty in dealing a girl who is hanging out alone.

Okay, next on let’s consider family approval. As insignificant as it is in your opinion, it’s undeniable that in eastern culture especially here in Indonesia, family approval towards your relationship play quite a major role. A girl may just be as mature as supposed to be in her age, but her dear old mom and dad may still insist that “she’s not ready yet” to engage in any romantic situations and rather should concentrate on her so-called academic and career issues (as lame as you think it may be, sometimes people value family’s demands or more popular by the term ‘obligations’ very highly and just go along with that “no romance allowed” rule). Well, the fact that she is hanging out alone, my friends once again leaves us with uncertainty about her family approval. Maybe she’s alone because she ain’t got no partner because she’s not allowed to, but also maybe because she’s just enjoying her time with herself — but still we don’t know which for certain.

Lastly I think we should consider her own interest towards you. Female, we can never figure out a their pattern of choosing partner. Some just go crazy when they see your rugged good looks and sculptured six packs, some don’t give a shit unless you’re filthy rich, some expect you to be an incarnation of Romeo Montague, etc. And that my friends, is another uncertainty, is it not?

  • Consideration in approaching a girl who is WITH HER GROUP OF FRIENDS at the time

Again for the point about sexual preference, there’s no certain way to tell a girl’s sexual preference when she’s outing with her group of friends (well except maybe if she’s extremely expressive towards her fondness of a certain people in her group of friends, which I guess the likelihood is rather low). So again in this point for a girl going out with her groups of friends we find an uncertainty.

Second point, her willingness to engage in a romantic situation. The fact that she’s hanging out with her friends may mean that “for this time I’m comfortable with just friends with no chance of romance attached” or may simply mean “now I just wanna hang with my friends, but I’m open to romance any other time”. But still, we don’t know for sure so let’s mark it as another uncertainty.

Family approval point, again you can’t tell from the situation. Maybe she’s hanging out with “just friends” because her family do not approve her to engage in any romantic matter or maybe it’s not that at all. Another uncertainty.

Her interest towards you, I guess we agreed that for this point it’s always uncertain.

  • Consideration in approaching a girl who is WITH HER FAMILY at the time

(Well peeps, I’m tired of restating my elaboration, and I guess if I do that you most probably be bored of the redundant explanation right? So we’ll cut it short)

Sexual preference : uncertain.

Willingness to engage on any romantic situation : uncertain.

Family approval : uncertain.

Her interest towards you : uncertain.

  • Consideration in approaching a girl who is WITH HER GUY at the time

Sexual preference : it’s kinda obvious is it not? She’s with her GUY. So…, we can be certain about her sexual preference. She prefers male.

Willingness to engage in romantic situations : duh! You see her in a public place, with her partner, it’s obvious  that she is willing to engage in a romantic situations. Another mark for certainty.

Family approval : well, let’s use some common sense. If your family do not approve your relationship with your partner, will you risk going out to a public place where a lot of people can come by you? What if your nosy neighbor or your uncle catch you red-handed? So I guess, if you find a girl who’s hanging out with her guy in a mall or some public places, you can virtually be certain about her family approval of her engaging in a romantic matter.

You may think for the point : her interest towards you we got another certainty, but in a negative way as in : certainly not it is. But hey, don’t be so pessimistic. It’s not that she’s wearing his ring or something, right? And you should remember that nowadays more and more people start thinking that “faithfulness” pre-matrimony is highly overrated. Isn’t that what dating is all about? So if someone have some doubts about his/her current partner, he/she can reconsider and maybe end up with another who is a better fit for them (because they haven’t vowed “till death do us part” right? So before they are engaged or married, it may as well be “till a much much  more eligible person do us part” or even “till boredom do us part”). And know what, I guess the number of cases in which someone left one’s partner for the sake of another person is increasing (slightly it may be but still… increasing!). So, in this point we got another uncertainty (which for once is kinda works in your favor).

Well then let’s sum it up : for  girl who is ALONE, or WITH HER GROUP OF FRIENDS, or WITH HER FAMILY at the time you see her in a mall or a cafe you got uncertainty in all 4 consideration points (sexual preference, willingness to engage in romantic situation, family approval, and her own interest towards you lest you forget ) — Whew, the prospect don’t sound too good for those ain’t it?

But on the other hand, for a girl who is WITH HER GUY at the time you see her in a mall or a cafe you got 3 certainty and 1 uncertainty (which kinda works in your favor) out of the 4 consideration points. So…, according to the  analysis towards the consideration you better off flirt with the girl who is WITH HER GUY at the time you meet her in public places right? Yeah maybe you won’t get her to be fond of you instantly, and perhaps her guy will give you a bruised eye for hitting on is girl, but maybe just maybe if you can manage to get her to has your number (and prove to her how bold you are for hitting on her right before her guy’s eyes — chic loves courageous lad right? RIGHT? And holding on to the sayings : fortune favors the bold) …who knows, maybe she will call you anytime soon. =)

IMPORTANT NOTE : I’m writing it down merely for formality, I’m 89,98633% sure that you all understand fully that this is mean to be some really-weird-shrewd-witty explanatory joke right? And therefore YOU SHOULDN’T TAKE IT VERY SERIOUSLY, okay? Great!